There are different phases in the life of an employee which define
the kind of employee they really are. It all depends on the initial mind-set of
the employee and the workplace situations which molds their personalities to
churn out the Monster they ultimately become.
So as per my experience the First phase in any employee’s
carrier is obviously joining to the workforce.. The initial mind-set of the
person can vary. One may be very optimistic, Thinking to change the world,
Contributing to the Value of the company.. (well that’s how I was)..
Then came the actual work. Its far far away from the
wonderland that we imagined.. Needless paper work.. Fruitless follow up..
Worthless mails… We begin to think why are we doing this clerk work, when we
can be building a Time Machine?? The only comforting time is the day when a
message pops up saying the salary is credited.. And so for the sake of the
money we continue to do the work.
Some people are good with other people. It’s not the case
with me. It’s hard for me to start the conversation if there is no official work
to discuss. And I cannot go joking around someone I just met while drinking
tea. It takes time for me to get comfortable around new people (A Looong time!)..
but when I do I bet I can be fun to be
around with. The worst are the awkward pass-bys in the halls, when you don’t know
to greet or just act dumb and see right thru them as they don’t even exist. Best
is to look at the floor as she is your Girlfriend and never let go... (Be careful
though... don’t bump into people!!)
So months pass... You’re doing the same shitty work. Meeting
with same shitty people and boss to question your every move... If you do something
on your own... Boss asks why didn’t you ask me??..If you ask too much. He
blasts you for not knowing anything!..
Next comes the Depression phase...
Now I have been sad before... It would last for max 2 day n I’m
back to normal... but with this I felt there is no escaping!! It felt like I was
in closed room with no doors or windows... and the room was slowly and steadily
closing in to crush me!.. Let me try to explain why I felt like that...
First of all the job sucked like hell!! Don’t believe me ??
let me explain you my job..
First you prepare a document... then you keep it on boss’s
table... And after a week or so (just before they start to decompose) he calls
for a review and tells useless corrections... then you go back, make those
change and rinse and repeat for 4 to 5 times!! By the time this is happening
all the departments are calling me every day for the follow up!.. Mostly I am
being accused for not releasing the documents on time or at all in some cases...
Then there are a select few #$%@% (Your welcome to fill in
your choice of words…) who just manages to get to your nerves!! It’s like just
by seeing them every day makes me feeling like going on a rampage and Killing
all the #*&$(Fill away!) living in the vicinity!!.. But you can’t! All you
do is smile... and that starts to kill you from inside!
Then to you think of changing the company but suddenly you
realize that no self-respecting company will hire your worthless little ass!! And
then there are further studies which unless money flows through your bottom like
diarrhoea, even then, it’s uncertain if you can do it..
So after all this you accept that you have to go to the Hell
hole every morning and try to survive the whole day. It became so unbearable
that the Tea breaks become milestones to conquer!! But you heart is not willing
to accept! So in retaliation it takes away your sleep... but if you don’t sleep
at night how are you able to go to office next day? Simple, You Don’t!.. you
sleep the whole day hoping there is no human contact, no phone, no nothing… Just
the senseless sleep... because that’s all you want to do... because it feelings
the closest thing to dyeing... But when
you avoid all human contact people gets suspicious... but not your roommate...
yeah I have roommate... quite a surprise ,isn’t it?.. Well for a roommate I have
got a selfish little asshole who only works for self-interest.. If he seems
interested in u.. He’s actually interested in your service to him!.. So continuing... people get suspicious and
they call home.. That’s when the shit really hits the fan!! Parents are worried
sick so I feel responsible and go into more depression.. I try explain to them
what I am going through and I make them more worried.. In that worriness they don’t
get what I am feeling.. They just want me to get NORMAL… But I have got no
reason to become normal, but for the sake of my parents I try to act “Normal”..
it’s a very difficult job! They take you to psycratrist and they put me on meds...
no counselling nothing... they don’t even know that I have reasons to be like
this!!.. for them it’s like a disease like typhoid or malaria..
After all this there is only one thing I have learnt... That
no matter how you feel... don’t open up to anyone!! It’s going to make it worse...
Keep it inside, try to be “Normal” and work the hell out of your job... No
matter what it is... just keep the mind occupied so that it does not think
about the shitty life.
So here ends the depression phase... But the depression doesn’t
go away.. IT Remains! But you learn to hide it. By doing work all the time and become
an ideal employee... You lose your Self- value somewhere along the way, so you
take up any work, enjoyable or not.
After this stage we become a perfect employee… if you come across
any employee who works like as ass (a donkey) all the time, Just know that he
might have gone through these stages... or maybe he’s just an ASS!